The Curious Case of Avatar Aang
by emletish
Summary: At 120 years old, Aang still looks 36. He has been fated to never age, as punishment from the spirits. It hurts because his friends age normally. Aang loses his friends in one lifetime - but finds them again in the next. This is a tale of re-incarnation, how history repeats itself, friendship and forgiveness. It is also a tale of love. Zutara, Sukka, platonic Taang
1. A Brilliant Feat

The Curious Case of Avatar Aang.

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

Chap 1: A brilliant feat.

-o-

_Did someone call my name_

_Like a distant drum is beating_

_Or is it just another dream_

_From long ago._

My brilliant feat – Colin Hay.

-0-

All his friends. How Aang loved them. How his heart broke when they left.

One by one, Aang watches them go. All peacefully, mind. There is nothing violent or awful in these deaths. They are all as old as the hills when they finally bid Aang that last goodbye.

Aang is there for all of his friends when the time comes.

But this story is not really about that.

It is about what happens afterwards.

-0-

When Aang was 12, he preformed a brilliant feat that the world had never seen.

Energy-bending.

All actions have consequences. This was something Aang knew and expected.

He was just surprised that the consequence of touching pure, absolute energy was this.

Aang had been frozen in time once before – but that wasn't quite like this.

Aang doesn't look or feel a day over 36.

He just celebrated his 120th (or his 220th depending on how one classifies his age) birthday.

-0-

When Monk Gyasto first explained what would happen, Aang had at been quite happy. It didn't really seem like a punishment. But that was what it was, nonetheless.

Monk Gyasto said that the spirits were angry that he had "stolen" their power for himself – the ability to give and take away bending was sacred. It was for the use of the spirits only. Yet Aang had been allowed to use it once, with their approval, when he was 12. He used energy bending then with due humility, respect and in the spirit of self sacrifice.

When he is 36, he uses energy bending because he can, not because it is necessary. He uses it because it is the easiest solution to a current problem. It was not the best solution, not by a long shot, but it was convenient.

The arrogance of this action angers the spirits.

Yet Aang is still beloved by them, some spirits shy away from wanting to punish him too severely. But the fact remains that Aang has committed a grave error in their eyes. He has strayed. He needs to be taught a lesson.

Who bent – who couldn't, that was for the spirits to decide. Not for a mortal man.

Therein lay the resolution. If Avatar Aang wished to conduct himself as a spirit – not just converse with them as a bridge between the worlds; If Aang was not content with just the Avatar's powers and instead used powers reserved only for the spirits; then he could live like a spirit as well.

An interminably long life, never changing, never aging.

Maybe after a millennia, he might learn.

-o-

"Oh, well that's not so bad. I thought they'd want to feed me to Koh they were so mad!" Aang is relieved. "Being young forever! That's not even a punishment. Now I'll have time to ride every different species of Giant Koi!" Aang is more than relieved, he is a little excited.

"It is not so simple Aang." Monk Gyasto is sad, and shakes his head. "You will not enjoy this punishment much in time."

-o-

Aang now knows why Monk Gyasto was so sad.

Aang watches his friends grow old.

Their faces get wrinkled.

Their hair goes grey.

They don't have the energy they used to have.

Aang stays perpetually completely healthy and in his mid-thirties.

He can do nothing to stop the effect that the slow procession of the years has on his friends.

-o-

He notices as Zuko starts to cough. Firebenders always end up having trouble with their lungs when they get old. It has something to do with smoke inhalation. Zuko gets cross at him and tells him not to fuss, whenever Aang expresses concern. He says he'll be fine, and it is just a spring chill, but he doesn't stop coughing in summer.

He hears all about Sokka's low cholesterol diet (from Sokka's excess of complaining.) This diet is strictly enforced by Suki. Sokka's (horror upon horrors) red meat consumption has to be reduced. It's not good for his heart.

He sees Suki's eyesight go, until she has to wear glasses as thick as Aang's finger. Still, even with her glasses, she can't read the labels unless she holds a jar _just so. _Aang reads them out for her. But sometimes she forgets what he just told her.

He feels Katara get weaker. This happens so slowly, that at first Aang doesn't notice. Over the years, her proud stance and posture are almost eroded, until she stands with a little stoop in her back that she can't straighten out. She is like a strong mountain slowly crumbling to the sea.

He helps Toph out with everything that he can, and moves into her house to care for her, after she tells him, with a great deal of irritation, about her tumour. She is actually rather humours about this. "You have to die something" she says with a shrug.

But she's wrong.

You actually don't.

Not if you are Aang.

-o-

Aang realises that is his punishment is much crueller than he originally thought. He will watch everyone he loves grow old and die. It is Zuko first. Then Sokka. Then Suki. Then Katara. Then Toph gets sick and Aang knows he can't take another goodbye.

He moves into her house, stays with her tirelessly. He brings her anything she wants, from anywhere in the world. He shows due humility to the spirits. He begs them for just a bit longer with Toph. They have punished him so terribly - he understands that now. But he has already been left all alone in the world once, he does not know if his heart can do that solitude again. He should be allowed to keep Toph at least.

One spirit shows kindness and pity.

Aang suspects it is Yue. She was always kind.

Under the light of the full moon, and under the care of one of Katara's grand-daughters, (a capable healer called Karra) and surrounded by her own endless brood, Toph makes a miraculous recovery. The tumour vanishes, almost like it never was. Toph's hair turns a bright white. She has been granted more time. Not enough perhaps.

Aang vows he will spend the rest of Toph's life with her. He'll not leave her side for the time she has left.

" That's silly Aang. I'm fine now. You're still the avatar. You have things to do. You can't spend the rest of your life fussing over a barmy old lady like me." Toph admonishes. She doesn't quite understand, until Aang says:

"Don't you get it; I'm never going to age. You can spend the rest of your life with me. But I can't ever spend the rest of my life with you."

There is a pause while Toph absorbs that; before she says "Well if you're staying then make yourself useful by fixing me a drink will ya. I'm parched."

-o-

They live in Republic City. For many years, it seems like Toph is in perfect health. She is ancient but still as sprightly as ever. The Doctors think it is because she is such a powerful bender that she is experiencing such incredible longevity. It happens with the very strong earth benders, and Avatars who have earth as their dominant element. Kyoshi lived over 200 hundred years, and Toph wants to break her record.

Aang and Toph look odd in the street together, but neither of them care. Toph is a tiny old lady, full of sass. Aang is strappingly handsome and in his mid-thirties and full of attendance to her every whim. He would make Toph his whole world if he could.

The world however, has other plans and constantly reminds Aang of its existence. It is still full of strife and problems. Aang still has a job to do as the Avatar. Toph, demands, challenges and forces him to face these problems. Like she always has; like she always does. She kicks him out sometimes – when she must, so that he will go out into the world and save it again, rather than stay around the house fussing over her.

It is on one of these enforced trips that Aang finds Katara again. Or, more accurately, Katara finds him.

Katara finding Aang – that is how things normally go.

-o-

The airbenders are flourishing as a race again. Aang has had many children to different women in his long years. He loves all his children dearly, but he tries to love them in a detached manner, like the monks taught him. But the Airnomads have changed and evolved since his childhood.

Things that remain the same: the village raises the child mentality; the core spiritual beliefs.

Things that changed: The forced separation and gender segregation; the everyday practices.

The Southern and the Western Airtemple are for people who wish to continue with what has become refers to as "the old ways". The Northern and the Eastern have been set aside for families who do not wish to be separated. Almost all the mothers live here with their children. The Northern Temple is especially for mothers with non-airbending babies. The airbending children stay until they reach their Samanera stage – after which they go to the temples of the old ways.

To Aang they are not "old ways", they are just "ways".

But then again, he is a very old man, even though he doesn't look it.

-o-

Today Aang is at the Northern temple visiting his daughter Cloud, the high priestess. Cloud looks like an old woman. Aang looks like her grandson.

Aang, foolishly in hindsight, said that Ty Lee could name their children whatever she wished, with no argument from him. He suspects that their children Cloud, Breeze, Storm, Wind and Gust, all went through a period in their adolescence when they resented him bitterly for this (especially Gust – that is just a rough break).

Aang has tried to never play favourites with his children, but he will always have a big soft spot for Cloud. She was his first-born to his favourite partner. He had never loved anyone quite like he had come to love Ty Lee in those years when he taught her Airbending. The memories of those days are rose-coloured and perfect and full of Ty Lee's chiming laugh. Aang thought that Cloud had managed to mix all of the good things that he and Ty Lee had to offer – but none of the bad.

Cloud was perpetually joyful and good at reading auras like her mother. She had an unwavering sense of what was right, boundless energy and a keen mind (and Aang liked to think she learned those things from him). But she had something else that was all her own. She didn't run away, she wasn't flighty – she was calm and steady at all times. Especially in a crisis.

The Northern Airtemple were currently housing some refugees from a conflict between two neighbouring regions. One former firenation colony called Lightning Ridge vs one old earth kingdom province called Cradle Mountains. Petty border dispute. Aang had come to sort the problem out.

He can't help but think, as Cloud explained the situation to him, _does it ever end?_

_-o-_

That evening Cloud and he are enjoying a meal together on the upper balcony, when a small girl approaches. She is bold and very curious about Aang. The ageless Avatar. Cloud tries to send her away gently, but Aang is instantly intrigued by the girl. She has wide grey eyes, pale skin and the lighter brown hair of the Northern Airnomads. She looks nothing like Katara, and yet something about her inexplicably reminds Aang of his oldest friend.

"Katara, Avatar Aang and I are trying to have a conversation that is for grown-ups only" Cloud admonishes.

"Your name is Katara!" Aang can't help but blurt out to the girl.

"Yes, my mother named me after the late firelady Katara, because she did lots and lots to help this temple. People call me Tara, except for High Priestess Cloud when she is cross at me." the girl explains.

"Well it is a lovely name." Aang says and Tara blushes.

"Katara, why don't you go help your brother with his inventions. He might be playing with matches again and need you to supervise." Being told to supervise her brother is obviously a sure-fire way to get rid of the girl.

"Do you want to come see my brother's inventions?" Tara asks Aang.

Aang would be delighted.

-o-

Teo is two years older than Tara and is named after the famous inventor who lived at the temple. He is more standoffish with Aang initially, but when Aang praises one of his small inventions or other, he instantly warms up. Tara fusses and bosses her brother. She takes the 'supervising' instruction very seriously. Teo is sarcastic and teasing towards his sister. There is some playful good natured bickering. Aang can't help but hear voices from the past in the banter of the children. _This is Katara, my flying sister...why don't we just ask Sokka's instincts?_

Aang is completely entranced by the two children. They are so much like Sokka and Katara that it makes something inside him ache in a bitter sweet way. When they invite him to play hide and seek with them he does. Then they play chase. Then Aang suggests a round of Airball and Teo gets an odd look on his face. "Why don't we play a different game? How about swaying grasses?" Tara says instantly. So they play swaying grasses, then Aang takes the kids for a ride on Appa – to their surprise and delight.

The Airnomad population is recovering rapidly – but the Sky Bison population has not yet caught up. Though there have been many breeding programs, the recovery of the Sky Bison population has been less rapid. Most of the current wild Sky Bison live in nature reserves and are actively encouraged by anxious zoologists to _get busy. _

Teo holds on to Appa's saddle for dear life. Tara is exhilarated.

Aang feels like it is almost like old times.

Almost.

-o-

"The boy's a non-bender. That's all." Cloud says, when Aang asks her about the odd moment with the airball suggestion. "Boy's mother refused to adopt him out and chose to come here with the girl, so they could stay together."

"Well it's a great temple for families. It's nice that these children get to grow up with their mother." _For once. _Aang replies.

" It would have been, but their mother died a few years ago during the fighting. I've tried my best to look after them here, so they did not have to be uprooted. Poor wee kids took it hard, especially Tara. She's been acting like a little itty bitty mother to Teo ever since it happened." Cloud says, sadly, yet calmly.

"What happened?" Aang whispers, horrified.

"Simple enough story. This was back in the days when we were assisting with the wounded. You know, retrieving them from the battlefield and tending to them. Their mother was trying to help a wounded Ridgian (The proper term for people from Lightning Ridge, though there are several derogatory terms around). He mistook her for an enemy and stabbed her. By the time we'd found her, there was not much we could do for her except make her comfortable." Cloud's voice is flat. She uses that voice when she feels too much.

Aang feels a cold chill go down his spine and a little pinprick of guilt in his stomach. He has been avoiding dealing directly with this conflict for years. He has written to both leaders, advising peace. He thought that these two small and insignificant regions would sort it out between themselves. But he did not actively intervene – he was old and more importantly he was tired of always having to sort out other people's problems. He'd had problems enough of his own at that point, with Toph being ill.

But now Sokka and Katara...no Teo and Tara, have lost their mother again.

Aang can't help but feel a little bit responsible.

"The spirits also saw fit to take the father, which is something that I don't understand. I wrote to the Southern airtemple after it happened, only to receive word that their father had also passed on, around the same time. Now I don't know what will happen to young Tara when she reaches Samanera age...without her Father to take her around. And poor Teo already misses all his friends so much, they all left earlier this year. Even if I could find an airbender suitable to escort Katara, I'm not sure what Teo will do when his sister goes. It's a very sad situation". Cloud finishes soberly.

It is a new Airnomad tradition – when a child reaches Samanera age (normally between 13-15) they leave the Temple of their mothers and go and have adventures with their fathers. Katara has no father to go exploring with. Teo has lost all his bender friends to exploring and has been left behind.

" I will take Katara and her brother too" Aang hears himself volunteer instantly, instinctively.

"But Dad, you haven't taken anyone for samanera travels in generations!" Cloud says, a bit surprised. "Besides it's against tradition to take a nonbender on samanera explorations."

"For Young Tara and Teo, I will make an exception." Aang says.

-o-

Aang found Zuko and Suki next.

Or Kuzon, and Satsu, as their names seemed to be now.

He found them in the order that he met them – a veritable lifetime ago.

Zuko was first.

-o-

After his conversation with Cloud, Aang had a renewed vigour for ending the conflict. He wrote to the leaders of Lightning Ridge and Cradle Mountain and received invitations from both. He went to Lightning Ridge first. They were officially the instigators.

He does not get to see the Governor of Lightning Ridge. The Governor is apparently too ill to receive guests, even one as illustrious as the Avatar. But he is entertained by the Governor's second-in-command. A man who calls himself Chin. He real name is something else, but he thought Chin, after the General who conquered with swaths of the Earth Kingdom (before Avatar Kyoshi stopped him) was a much grander name.

Chin has aspirations to be like his namesake. He feels that the land that Lightning Ridge has "annexed" from Cradle Mountain is rightfully theirs.

Chin has all the power in Lightning Ridge right now. He manoeuvres it behind the Governors back.

Chin has vanity, ambition and cruelty in his manner.

Chin has two children which he alternately neglects and abuses.

Chin had a wife, who mysteriously vanished some years prior. Everyone thinks he murdered her, but no one can prove it.

Chin reminds him chillingly of Ozai.

His children remind Aang of Zuko and Azula, back when he first met them.

Does history always have to repeat itself in such a calamitous fashion?

-o-

There is a boy called Kuzon and a girl called Elza. They were paraded for Aang and introduced to him. They will be joining their father for dinner. Their inclusion is a tactical move by Chin, as it will prevent matters from being discussed too deeply (One wishes to protect children from such things after all). Children at the table limits how unpleasant things can get. How seriously things can be discussed.

Kuzon bows low when he is introduced and says "It is an honour to meet you, Avatar Aang" with a great deal of sincerity.

His sister teases him for this on the walk to the dining room. They are behind the main guests and used to being overlooked. They do not know that Aang is listening to their conversation.

"It is an honour to meet you?" the girl, Elza, imitates her brother. "Do you know how stupid you sounded?"

"Well it was an honour! He's the Avatar and he's like as old as the hills. He's a great man and he deserves our respect." Kuzon retorts, tartly.

"Don't let Dad hear you say that! You know how he feels about _The Great Man_." Elza teases, but there is the slightest hint of warning in her tone.

"Anyway...you know... I think the Avatar coming might be a good thing... Maybe he can stop the fighting, then ….then nobody else had to get hurt." Kuzon says hesitantly, like it is blasphemy to not wish anyone hurt.

"_Nobody else has to get hurt?!"_ Elza repeats what Kuzon said in a mocking tone. "Spirits – do you hear what a dum-dum you sound like right now? People from Cradle Mountain will keep getting hurt until they agree that we have won." Elza is very firm on the fact that Cradle Mountain deserves everything it gets.

"Our people get hurt too , Elza. " Kuzon replies.

Elza has no reply. But she needs none. They are at the dining room now. Chin's dining room, indeed Chin's presence is a place where children are seen and not heard. It is a place where children are only allowed to speak if they are spoken to. It is place where if you spare the rod, you spoil the child.

-o-

Dinner gets heated. Though Aang tries to keep his cool, Chin is beyond unreasonable. He does not waver or concede anything. He stands by the invasion, which he refers to as an annexation, as a just and right thing. He tells Aang to let Cradle Mountain know that they simply must concede the land to Lightning Ridge and stop fighting for it – if they want the bitter struggle to end. If they keep fighting, Lighting Ridge will keep retaliating. Lightning Ridge is by far superior and will not bow down to Cradle Mountain.

This is not the outcome that an Avatar would wish.

Aang and Cloud both try to point out why exactly Cradle Mountain will not just roll over and concede without some concessions on Chin's part. Aang had heard that forces from Lightning Ridge accidentally set fire to a school in one of the border towns. Children were hurt. Some were killed. Cradle Mountain will see this as a hostile act of war. They wish to fight over their lost land and their lost children. If Chin does not curb his Jingoism, then it will lead to full on war.

Aang says that he is sure that the school was an accident and starts outlining the steps he feels Chin must take, to avoid a bloody, prolonged conflict, when Chin interrupts him. "That was no accident, Avatar Aang. I ordered it." Chin announces.

There is a moment's shocked silence round the table. Aang hopes to all the spirits he misheard.

"With an enemy like Cradle Mountain, you've got to hit them where they live, Avatar Aang. The children are their hope for the future. Without children they will be demoralised. If they know that their continued actions will result in the death of their children, they will desist in due time." Chin explains it all, in an emotionless voice. Pure tactician.

"How on earth could you do something like that Dad! Deliberately killing their kids? That's atrocious, and pointless and cruel." Kuzon blurts out, disgusted with his father. Then his eyes widen in horror as realises what he just did. He takes in his father's livid face and immediately apologises.

There is palpable tension at the table. Chin folds his napkin, with a forced and deliberate calm that is unnerving.

"I think it is time my children were in bed." He says flatly. Then he clicks his fingers, just once, and Elza and Kuzon get up and fall instep behind them. Just outside of the doors, which Chin closes roughly behind him, there is a scene of some description.

Aang and Cloud can only hear the proceedings and be horrified anew.

"Dad, he didn't mean it. You know how he's just a big dummy. He's not clever like you." Elza speaks first. She is trying to make light of the situation and appeal to her father's ego.

"Go to bed Elza" Chin hisses. "I will speak to Kuzon alone."

There is a pause and then the sound of departing feet.

There is a small silence. But only for a moment.

There is a tremendous smack. Then the muffled noise that a child makes when they are trying their hardest not to cry out in pain. There is another smack, and this time Kuzon does cry out.

Aang leaps to his feet to intervene. Cloud holds him back. They can't intervene. A man like Chin will take any meddling with his children as the gravest insult possible. It will exacerbate this situation, which already tilts on a knife edge.

The Avatar can interfere with many things; nations, states, conflicts, spirits.

The Avatar cannot interfere in how other people raise their children.

-o-

The next night, he dines with the leader of Cradle Mountain. A nervous, yet kind man called Bero, who seems in over his head. A relatively new leader, he came to power upon the death of his father last year. He reminds Aang strongly of Kuei, in the early days. Lord Bero is surrounded by competent military men and a clever and outspoken daughter called Satsu, who help him compensate for his current inadequacies as leader. It is with Satsu that Aang has the most interesting conversation.

Satsu, like Suki, projects a sort of "born to lead" energy. She is calm, sensible and clever. She gives Aang the most honest and insightful rundown of the situation; from what she has heard said by her father's Generals and her own ingenuity.

There must have been a coup in Lightning Tidge. Around five years ago, their Governor took ill, and the vice-governor disappeared. The third in-charge, retired due to "family problems". He has not been seen in public since. Chin was fourth in line, but took the mantle of control.

Then the bombardments started.

Though she would very much like for peace, Satsu feels like war is as inevitable as the tides. You can't fight against a man like Chin, but you can't not fight him all the same. Cradle Mountain will stand against the tyrant, to preserve freedom, liberty and in the memory of their lost children.

Satsu can already see how it will go. There will be a relation for what happened at the school. Chin will retaliate and escalate the attacks, in response. Cradle Mountain will call upon the TerraTeam, in response to that. Lightning Ridge will call upon the Yu Yuan Archers in response to that. Then Cradle Mountain will unleash everything it has at Lightning Ridge... and Lightning Ridge will do the same.

Unless Aang can find a way to make the Tyrant Chin stand down, there will be war.

-o-

After this conversation, Aang feels he may have been a bit to hard of Avatar Kyoshi.

If there was a way for him to make this Chin conveniently fall to his death, he would gladly take it.

-o-

Aang and Cloud stay at the only safe border crossing between the two regions the next evening. They spent the day canvassing the border towns. Aang is fried. All day, his brain is frantically scrambling for a future solution while his mind is haunted by the past. He feels sure he is seeing them again, all his dearly beloved friends, reborn in these children and caught up in this dreadful conflict. Aang wants desperately to help them, to make the world a better and brighter place for them.

But the past keeps repeating itself in the most bizarre ways.

It will again before the night is out.

-o-

Around three in the morning, there is the most calamitous noise. A frantic knocking. An insistent banging and kicking on the old door. Aang is a light sleeper – something in the banging sets his teeth on edge.

It is trouble. Aang _feels_ it in his bones.

While the innkeeper is still rousing from his bed, it is Aang that has already flown downstairs to open the door. The small cloaked figure responsible for the knocking instantly flees. Aang's first instinct is to chase, but then he sees what was left.

Kuzon, severely beaten and bleeding horribly from his face, lies unconscious on the ground at Aang's feet.

-0-

Aang lifts the boy into his arms as gently as if he was a basket of fresh eggs and takes him into the inn. He is aware he is being watched by a silent figure in the bushes. Everyone is awake in the inn now and there is much commotion over the wounded boy. Aang lays Kuzon on the nearest table. Cloud, always good in a crisis, immediately starts giving the boy first aid. It is she who notices the note tied around the boy's wrist.

-o-

_Avatar Aang. _

_This Is Your Fault! _

_Make Him Better!_

_Or Else!_

_Write to Hiro who works in the that Dragon TeaShop in Ba Sing Se. He can take care of Kuzon!_

-o-

Aang puts the odd note in his pocket while Cloud examines Kuzon. He is bruised everywhere. There's a broken wrist (defensive injury. He tried to fight back). There are broken ribs. (He's gotten knocked around really badly.) All that damage will heal in time – but the poor lad's face will bear the marks of this night forever.

There are huge gashes. They go from his forehead, through his eyebrow, to his cheek. It looks like someone took a jagged knife to the left side of the child's face. It's the mark of dishonour in Lightning Ridge. Three Jagged Lines. Always on the left side of the face. They do it to "cowards" in their army, Cloud explains. It is so that everyone will know their shame.

Aang feels a horrible cold feeling that is not dissimilar from guilt settle in his stomach.

"Poor lad, these will scar badly and there's nothing I can do about that," Cloud says softly as she wraps the boy's face in a soft bandage made from torn bedsheets. There are no medical facilities or supplies in this tiny town. Cloud is making do – but she is anxious to get the boy back to the temple, where they have trained healers and fully stocked medical supply rooms. She is worried about infection.

"Maybe he'll make them becoming. He might not mind being scarred in the end." Aang offers, trying to be optimistic and hating how his normally cheerful daughter is talking in such a defeatist tone.

"Can't imagine any child enjoying being marked like this. It's a tragic mutilation. He could have been handsome once, with a face like that." Cloud offers sadly, as she looks at the unblemished right side of Kuzon's face.

"He'll still be handsome." Aang argues, but even he doesn't quite believe it.

-o-

While Cloud secures Kuzon on Appa, and tries to make him comfortable for the journey, Aang takes a small moment to address the silent watcher, still in the bushes. Aang comes closer, the figure retreats into a small clearing, and Aang follows. The figure is so tiny. Aang can tell that it's only a child. He has a few guesses as to who it is – even though she determinedly covers her face with her hood.

" I received your note. We are doing everything we can for Kuzon. We will take him to the temple now where he can receive proper treatment. I will contact Hiro, but first I would like to know who exactly he is to the child." Aang says all this in a calm, genial tone.

The figure considers this for a second and judges it reasonable. "It's his Uncle." Elza lowers her voice to sound different and older, but Aang can still tell it is her.

His uncle...of course.

"He has to go to Uncle. He can't come home...ever." Elza continues. Her voice catches on the word _ever. _

"Thank you Elza, you did the right thing bringing him to me." Aang says, trying for a consoling tone. Elza gasps, removes her hood in a sharp gesture and glares straight at Aang, demanding "How did you know it was me?!" There is an accusation in her voice and a glint in her eye.

"I'm very clever." Aang replies evenly.

"That's not what everybody else says." Elza says, slightly sarcastically, trying to be funny. Aang is reminded sharply of Azula, standing tall and proud in an abandoned town, trying to joke at the expense of her brother. _Go on, you can laugh, it's meant to be funny. _

Suddenly the girl moves. She moves so quickly, reflexes as fast as an airbender's. She grips Aang's arm with her small hand and asks intently "Will Kuzon be alright?" Her hand grips his arm tighter. Aang is momentarily unnerved, but responds calmly "I hope so. High Priestess Cloud says he should recover from most of his injuries." Most, not all. The girl hears that, even though it remains unspoken. She lets go of Aang and slumps slightly.

She is very much like Azula and yet she is not at all like Azula at the same time. She obviously loves her brother. Perhaps this is the only thing of value Azula's spirit learned in her last life.

"Has he woken up?" she asks softly.

"Not yet."

"Well when he does tell him...tell him...oh! Just think of something good and tell him I said it. " She says that last bit in frustration. She is not used to saying kind things. She turns quickly and starts striding off. Aang sees a tethered ostrich horse by the fence.

Aang thinks two questions.

_Spirits, did she ride the whole way with her injured, unconscious brother on an ostrich horse?_

_Spirits where is she going?_

He asks the second.

"Back home, idiot. Have to get back by sun-up , so Dad never suspects I left." Elza explains, like Aang is a moron.

"No, don't go back to him!"Aang says sharply. He doesn't know the full story, but he knows that bad things happened to Azula when she was left alone with Ozai. He does not think that Elza will fare much better with Chin.

"I have to Avatar Aang. I have no choice." Elza is awfully resigned and resolute for someone so young.

"You do Elza, You always have a choice." Aang tries a final time. A note of pleading creeps into his voice. He couldn't save Sokka and Katara from losing their mother. He couldn't save Zuko from being horribly scarred. But maybe, just maybe, he can save Azula from her fate.

"You wouldn't understand." Azula says with a slight shake of her head, and then she gives her ostrich horse a slight kick and gallops off. Aang watches as her figure disappears into the darkness.

-o-

Kuzon wakes up on Appa, confused and disorientated and in a lot of pain, but he grimaces and grits his teeth and tries to pretend he is not hurting. He pretends he hasn't broken three ribs and yesterday wasn't the worst day of his life.

Goodness he is so much like Zuko that Aang almost expects a scolding and a firebending lesson from him.

Kuzon asks three questions. He asks what happened. He asks where they are taking him. He asks for his sister. Aang feels like all his answers are unsatisfactory.

Aang tries to cheer the boy up. "You'll like it with us Kuzon. The temple will be like your home, until you're feeling better and your Uncle can come and collect you. There's lots of exploring and fruit tarts and there's even some kids your age to play with."

The last thing seems to spark Kuzon's interest. They weren't allowed out much by their dad and Kuzon has never really had a chance to play with other children. "What other kids?" he asks, warily but curiously.

"A boy named Teo and a girl named Tara. I think you'll like them"

-0-

* * *

Author's notes:

Lovely readers, you have reached the end of the first chapter of The Curious Case of Avatar Aang. Thank you very much for reading and I hope you enjoyed it.

Those of you anxiously awaiting an update on Not Stalking Firelord Zuko: Don't Panic! It is coming – but this little story just crawled into my brain and took up all my creative energy for this last week. So this story is set far in the future of a world in which Zutara happened. So sorry if you love love love LOK – but I see the future of the Avatar world going differently. Some issues that were brought up in Korra, like bender privilege, will be utilised in this story, but aside from that LOK doesn't exist.

In fact I wanted to deal with a few things that really depressed me about Legend of Korra. I hated seeing Aang not really learn from his experiences and just hand a deux-ex-bending back to Korra at the end. I hated seeing that the benders actually **were the oppressors **and that this very salient point was just brushed aside and the whole issue was unsatisfactorily dealt with. I hated how actions didn't really have consequences and I really hated how young the Gaang all died. Why not set it 100 years in the future – so at least we know they all had a good innings?

So in this story, the spirit bending from ATLA finale has a big consequence for Aang. There is much debate about this ending (was Aang right/was this justified/etc). Rather than go into that, I feel that Aang's biggest problem would be that he would come to see energy bending as a 'easy way out' – a sort of _get out of jail/my unpleasant duties for free_ card – mostly because it is treated as such by the series.

So when Aang plays _the get out of jail free card _again, when he is thirty six, the spirits pretty much say _err no – go directly to jail, do not pass go and do not collect 200 dollars. _His punishment of living and being young forever would have been a blast at the start – until the rest of the Gaang started aging.

The rest of the Gaang all lived until they were really incredibly ridiculously old in this universe – but they could not live forever. So now it is just Toph and Aang left (and you know that Toph would become one of those cool and sassy grandmas who gives her grandkids drumkits and is inappropriately honest with everyone.) Aang wants to spend all the time he can with Toph and I can just imagine her rolling her eyes and taking the piss out of him.

But something that was brought up in The Avatar and the Firelord – the possibility of re-incarnation – will be explored here. Aang's not the only one with past lives after all. So Aang will meet Zuko, Katara, Sokka and Suki, in their new lives and the bonds of friendship lasting between lifetimes will be tested. History will repeat itself. Aang will face old problems with new faces.

Pairings will be Zutara (obviously) and Sukka... Well now it will be Tara/Kuzon and Satsu/Teo...and platonic Taang.

Next chapter Kuzon will settle into life at the airtemple, and will be reunited with his Uncle. Toph will think Aang is tripping balls and going senile in his young age when he tells her about his discovery. She will want to test his hypothesis for herself. And shenanigans will ensue.

Til then lovely readers...


	2. Don't you want to share the guilt?

-o-o-o-

Don't you want to share the guilt?

-o-o-o-

_Not being able to articulate what I want to say drives me crazy. _

_I think I should read some new books, learn some new words. _

_I like to shout, but I also wish I could be quiet. _

_When I'm quiet people just think I'm sad. _

_Usually I am. _

Kate Nash – Don't you want to share the guilt?

-o-

For two months, Kuzon didn't utter a word to Aang. Sometimes he gave Aang a reproachful look out of his good eye – but that was the only communication between them. On the way to the air temple, Kuzon had decided to take refuge in silence and hadn't spoken since. He'd look the other way whenever Aang tried to talk to him.

He seemed to blame Aang, just like his sister did.

Aang felt this was unfair.

Why did everything always have to be Aang's fault?

-o-

Cloud said it was to be expected. It wasn't personal – so Aang should not take it personally. It seemed like he didn't utter a word to anyone in the Air Temple. He didn't even speak to Cloud.

He'd let Cloud bandage and re-bandage his various wounds in silence. He'd turn his face to the wall and clench his fists the entire time. When she was finished, he would bow in thanks – and then walk off like he had some very important business elsewhere.

Cloud said they should be patient and keep in mind that the boy had lost everything. His whole world had been turned on its head in one fell swoop. He was still recovering. He hadn't stopped flinching when people made loud noises or sudden movements near him yet.

Cloud thought they should leave him be. He'd talk when he was ready. He was a good boy, really. He ate what they fed him, slept where they told him, wore the clothes they gave him all without comment or complaint.

-o-

Aang got a letter back from Toph.

A rather unusual letter.

Katara always helped Toph with her letters when she was alive. Since she had passed, Aang had taken over writing Toph's letters for her. When he was away on avatar business, Toph tried to find a temporary assistant. But none of them were ever **quite right.** They were never like Katara or Aang. Toph ran through "assistants" like crazy.

_Okay kid, write down everything I say EXACTLY._

_Are you ready to write?_

_Dearest, most idiotic and stupid Twinkletoes. _

_**You are tripping donkey-bull balls! **_

_Oops, sorry kid, maybe you better write:_

_You have your head in the clouds, come back to earth. _

_He'll find that funny because he's an airbender, you see. _

_Okay, obviously you have been eating too many cactus juice enhanced fruit tarts up in that temple. You are__** definitely hallucinating**__. There is no way you have met Katara and Sokka and Zuko and Suki again. Don't mumbo-jumbo back at me about your "avatar senses!"_

_Yes thanks Lei Li, with lemon...and a finger biscuit. _

_You didn't just write that, did you kid?_

_Kid, you don't have to write down __**everything**__ I say exactly. _

_I don't care what I said. I am old and barmy and can be as contrary as I like._

_Also isn't it __**obvious **__what I want to go in this letter. _

_He__** already knows**__ how I take my tea - you ninny!_

_Incoherent, disgruntled mumbling. _

_Okay, this is __**too frustrating.**__ Just tell him that he is either going regular crazy or going senile in his old age. _

_I know he wants to have the others back – but we can't have everything we want. _

_I miss them too. I miss them everyday. _

_But I don't go around imagining I see them everywhere. _

_Though I wish I did - Any one of those four was __**eight million times**__ better at writing my letters than you, you silly ninny. _

_Finally, tell him he has to lay off the cactus juice, stop messing about with those kids and resolve the border crisis – because that sounds like it is__** getting dicey**__. The papers here are saying that Chin murdered his son, and that is causing huge instability in Lightning Ridge. _

_Even ridgians don't like fathers who murder their children. Keep in mind they__** let it slide**__ when Chin murdered his wife – if you please!_

_But there is some __**bad shit **__going down in that country Aang. I don't like everything they are saying about how unstable it is. Rigid Ridgers are already crazy bastards – we don't want them any more unstable than they already are. _

_**Avatar duties have to come first. No slacking!**_

_Or else I will march up to that temple and kick your arse. _

_Oi – where the hell is my tea and finger biscuit?_

_If you just wrote that, you ninny, I will kick your arse as well!_

Then there was Toph's customary squiggle at the bottom. It was how she signed all her letters to him. She couldn't ever dictate the words. She had a problem saying them out loud. But Aang knew that squiggle meant:

_Love Toph_

-o-

Kuzon was always spending time with Tara or Teo. Aang had been right, the children really **took** to each other. It mystified Aang **how** a friendship could form, grow and flourish with Kuzon so silent, but one did.

Tara and Teo had been wary and curious when Kuzon first arrived. Kuzon had been shy and unsure around them. But then, one day, almost without Aang noticing, something shifted between them. Something thawed. Now there was only warmth between the tree kids.

Kuzon and Teo often practised sword-fighting together, with long sticks that they had carved themselves. Tara would sometimes join them and sometimes scold them for being _such boys –_ depending on her mood.

The boys' affinity for sword fighting made perfect sense to Aang. Kuzon was actually really good, and Teo was rapidly improving (no small feat considering he was instructed only through silent demonstrations).

There was some concern over this with the other Air Nomads at the temple. Teaching of any martial arts aside from Airbending was strictly forbidden by the sacred texts. But Cloud, as high priestess, allowed it. She saw no harm in it. They were both non-benders and couldn't learn airbending. It made both boys so happy. Well, it made Teo really happy. With Kuzon, it was hard to tell.

He only really _looked _happy when he went gliding with Tara. He smile a really genuine smile for her, when they sailed through the air together. She had taught him very quickly. Like Teo, he was a fast learner. Now they glided every day before dinner. They had races. Tara would do tricks and show off. Kuzon would try to copy her. He could already do a loop-de-loop.

He liked to test his limits.

He liked to try fly in circles around Tara.

-o-

Aang had seen them, up in the high orchard, that very first day they tried gliding. "You have to hold this pose mid-air...just like this" Tara had struck a pose with her glider to demonstrate.

"You also have to really pull your belly in... like this" Tara had said as she picked up Kuzon's hand and placed it on her stomach. His eyes had widened, and he'd blushed slightly.

"Now you try" Tara had said, in her normal bossy tone. Kuzon had copied her. She'd placed her hand on his stomach and then looked up and said "Good! I think you're ready."

Kuzon evidently didn't feel ready. He'd hesitated on the ledge, then gripped his glider with white knuckles. Tara had smiled at him and leaned over and whispered something in his ear. Aang had no idea what she said, but it evidently did the trick.

When she jumped off the ledge a moment later, Kuzon followed.

-o-

Teo and Tara frequently spoke for Kuzon, especially at meal times. _Kuzon wants more rice. Kuzon wants an extra big slice of dessert pie. No he doesn't – you always eat it for him. We never get any!_ Kuzon would look at Cloud, point to the dessert, then hold up two fingers – to indicate that he wanted two slices.

Cloud had taken to being a bit of a fusspot over Kuzon. She always gave him his own way whenever he directly indicated wanting anything (which was rare, admittedly). Two slices of fruit pie where put in front of Kuzon. He handed one to Tara and one to Teo and rolled his eyes at them fondly; like he thought they were idiots, but liked them all the same.

All that silence at meal times lead Aang to think that Kuzon didn't speak to Tara and Teo either.

He got the surprise of his life when he found out the opposite.

_-o-_

_Twinkle Toes this will be a quick letter. _

_Do you know how hard it is to find good assistants. I've given up! This one is being written by our kitchen maid, Lei Li – so make sure you bring her back something nice. She deserves it. She's been a great help when she's not making out with her ….0! *&S_

There was a lot of smudging on the paper.

_Okay, I can't tell you about that now. But I can tell you that you have completely__** lost it.**__ I am coming up there to that blasted temple myself to kick your arse! By the time you get this, I will be on my way. _

_Idiot. _

There was her customary squiggle.

_Love Toph. _

_-o-_

Aang was so pleased that Toph was coming. Not only because she'd meet the kids and see for herself that Aang was **not **crazy. He was glad because he really needed her help. She was always a great help.

He was nearly out of ideas. He had been working much more closely with the co-operative Cradle Mountain, the surrounding regions and the Northern Water Tribe. He had overseen meetings and steered all the leaders towards a full blockade of Lightning Ridge. No supplies in or out.

He'd wanted to find a peaceful, non-violent solution to the problem of Chin.

A bloodless siege. Starve them into submission. It was the best solution Aang could think of.

It was non-violent, but that didn't mean that people didn't get hurt.

Aang tried not to doubt himself.

It wasn't** his fault. **

All that Chin needed to do was sign an armistice and the blockade would end.

But the bastard wouldn't sign it.

Toph had always been good at cracking the hardest of nuts. Aang was hoping she'd want to take a shot at this one. And soon.

_-o-_

Aang had folded away his letter and wandered the old temple. He'd been thinking on Toph and her unique negotiating style, when he heard it. The astonishing sound of Kuzon laughing. He followed the sound and found Kuzon and Tara, sitting under the orchard trees, playing with Momo and _chatting!_

Suddenly Tara said "oh, I nearly forgot," She got up, reached into her pocket and hid her arms behind her back."I've got something really great for you." Tara sing-songed, with her hands behind her back. "Pick a hand."

Kuzon pointed at her left. She smiled and handed a letter over. "This came for you with the rest of the mail. Cloud asked me to give it to you." Kuzon took the letter and opened it cautiously, while Tara tried to peer over his shoulder. "Well, what does it say?"

Kuzon said "Give me a minute - will you!" fondly, but moved the letter out of her line of sight. He spoke to her without ceremony, like conversations and affectionate admonishments were a normal occurrence between them. His face was happy as he started reading. "It's from my Uncle." he told Tara. "He says he'll be here in a week or two."

"Oh that's great!" Tara said, just as Kuzon's face dropped dramatically. His expression looked really worried. "Are you okay?" she asked instantly, with some concern. She shuffled closer to him and asked "What's wrong?"

"He says he can't wait to show me the rest of the world. He quit his old job and thinks he'll have enough money to buy a teashop in Republic City." Kuzon explained.

"I've heard it's really nice there. " Tara said soothingly, trying to sound optimistic and cheerful...but her face looked sad too.

"But it's so far away. I don't know...I'm used to it here now. And now every thing's going to change _again_." Kuzon said quietly. Tara scooted closer again and said "Maybe it will change for the better?"

"No, it wont!" Kuzon said quickly and harshly. "If I'm in Republic City, I won't be able to see you..." Tara's eyes widened. Kuzon blushed and turned away and added "or Teo." lamely.

Tara was blushing terribly. She picked at the grass nervously. Then she seemed to shake herself out of it. "Don't be silly" she said briskly. Kuzon looked up in surprise at her. "We're airnomads. I'm nearly old enough for samanera travels. We'll come and visit you **all the time. **I promise that we'll come visit you so much that you'll be sick of us." He smiled widely at her. She smiled back at him.

Aang felt like he was intruding on something private and delicate.

-o-

Aang brought it up with Tara next time he caught her on her own. They were brushing down Appa together. Appa had rolled on his back, delighted, while Tara concentrated extra hard on brushing out the bristles in between his toes. She was brushing so hard to avoid the question that Aang had just asked her.

But Aang was patient, he didn't mind waiting.

"Well, yes – he does talk to me - and Teo." She said eventually, carefully. Aang asked if she knew why Kuzon wouldn't talk to any of the adults. Didn't she think it was odd that he was so silent and withdraw around other people? Tara shifted uncomfortably. She evidently didn't like talking about Kuzon behind his back. But she also only ever wanted to please Aang. She turned and brushed Appa's fur again and thought for a few moments before saying "He told me that he doesn't have anything to say to anyone else."

"What about his Uncle? He'll be here in a couple of days. Do you think Kuzon will have anything to say to him?" Aang asked. He didn't mean to pry. He didn't like to ask her. But the silent treatment was really getting to him.

Zuko** never** gave Aang the silent treatment. Zuko would get mad and shout at Aang, but he'd never stopped talking to him like this. Aang used to get a bit sanctimonious whenever Zuko got mad at him. The monks had always told him that anger was bad. He'd tried to pass this wisdom onto a disgruntled Zuko.

Now, in one of life's perverse twists, Aang found that all he really wanted was for Kuzon to have a shout, let it out, show some emotion.

He wished the boy would just let himself be angry about the terrible thing that had happened to him.

Instead, Kuzon just gave Aang silent, disappointed looks. He didn't rant and rage unnecessarily. He kept everything bottled up. It was disconcerting.

Maybe this Uncle Hiro could help him snap out of it. Uncle Iroh had always been great with Zuko after all...

"We'll have to wait and see."Tara said simply as she finished Appa's feet. She hopped down with one graceful bound, and asked if she could be excused. It was getting later in the afternoon, and she wanted to get some gliding in.

-o-

The resolve of Lightning Ridge was weakening and their grain and rice stores ran low. Winter was closing in. The people were getting angry.

If there wasn't peace – there would be revolution.

An endless, bloody, civil war.

And that would be on Aang's conscience.

He could end it all now. He had perfected lightning bending over the years (thanks to Iroh's patience and constant encouragement). He could do it quickly and painlessly. It would be a better death than many felt Chin deserved.

The generous part of Aang wanted to give Chin a second chance, and hoped desperately that Toph could work some magic.

The cowardly part of him knew that this wasn't because Chin deserved a second chance, it was because he didn't want to be directly responsible for another death.

He had been in this situation twice before. A necessary death. A deserved death. Aang always showed mercy. What he thought was mercy.

But mercy was much more complicated than he thought. He could spare one dictator and thousands starved, hundreds would be injured or killed, and a country would be ripped apart from the insides.

He had to call it merciful.

-o-

Uncle Hiro arrived on a sunny afternoon, a few days earlier than expected. Cloud and Aang greeted him in the main atrium. He was younger and more sprightly that Aang had expected.

Cloud asked how he had arrived so early.

Hiro explained that he had the good fortune to run into a generous and wonderful lady, with a Private Airship that was en route to this very temple. He had beguiled a lift from the good lady. Hiro felt that sharing a journey with a fascinating stranger was one of life's true delights. With that explanation, Hiro asked to be excused. He was most keen to see his nephew. Cloud waved him off with directions to the orchard.

-o-

Toph's arrival was as dramatic and full of admonishments as Aang expected. He was called a fanciful idiot who had taken leave of his senses (multiple times). He was admonished for making Toph come all this way. He was told that she thought a blockade was a good idea – given the circumstances . Yes people were suffering, but Aang shouldn't blame himself for every bit of human misery and human stupidity out there.

After Aang had set her up in the best and warmest room, and fluffed her pillows and brought her tea, (just how she liked it) Toph decided to explore the temple, saying jovially "Come on, I want to meet these hallucinations of yours!"

* * *

Notes:

Lovely readers, you've reached the end of chapter two. thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed it.

_Don't you want to share the guilt_ is a title of a Kate Nash song that I dig. This chapter hints at few of the things Aang feels guilty about. The other person he energy bended, would be rather prominetly featured in the guilt department. We will find out all about what happened when Aang was thirty-six in a few chapters.

I think Aang has a very clear cut idea of what it is to be merciful, and he has always tried to be merciful. But his concept of mercy has been challenged many times. I think he would avoid killing at all costs. His reluctant to take life is not wrong, but it is very problematic when dealing with dictators. Is it mercy to spare one life if that leads to the continued suffering of thousands? Aang is faced with that question numerous times in his life.

Putting the whole world before his own spiritual needs - I think that Aang would always struggle with this. He would struggle to know what is right. I actually think that Aang would grow to be self aware enough (at this age) to realise when he had made a selfish choice. I think he would feel guilty about those choices, but he wouldn't necessarily choose any differently.

Aang will always think of round-a-bout ways to tackle problems, rather than taking them on head-first. Sometimes this will be great, and sometimes not. In this case, he has facilitated a blockade of Lightning Ridge, instead of directly confronting Chin. (But that confrontation is coming). Aang acknowledges that this decision has spared him peforming an unpleasant duty, but has condemned thousands to more suffering. He has to call it merciful to justify it to himself.

Aang has many things in his life that he feels guilty over. I think that would just come with the job of being the Avatar. In all his years he hasn't learned to process and deal with that guilt in a constructive manner. In this chapter he projects his feelings of guilt onto Kuzon's silence. He thinks that Kuzon's silence is some sort of indictment on him.

Really, it's nothing to do with Aang. Kuzon's got_ his own thing _going on now.

I think that Kuzon would use silence as a coping mechanism. Zuko's anger seemed like it was directed outward a great deal, but I think there was no one he was angrier at than himself. Aang is used to dealing with that outward anger, and so the silent treatment throws him for a big loop. That anger was often a shield for what was really bothering him, and a way of pushing people away. Zuko did not communicate his feelings very well. Kuzon directs his feelings inward and has chosen not to communicate with the adults around him at all, rather than waste time/energy being outwardly angry. Zuko's spirit did eventually learn to curb his anger.

I also I think Kuzon's silence would be mostly directed at the adults. He would be very mistrustful of adults after a history of abuse, and partly because he is still sorting things out for himself. But he has been talking freely to Teo and Tara this whole time when no grown ups are around.

But he spoke to Tara first. Make of that what you will.

Answers to a few questions.

I see the kids as 11-13ish. Everyone is a non-bender except Tara, who bends air. I wanted to take a closer look at the bender/nonbender issue in later chapters, and I felt having a bigger portion of non-benders would help in the story that I want to tell.

So there were a few questions about the nature of Lightning Ridge and Cradle Mountain. Why can't the firenation just come in and sort it out if they are former colonies?

I see the Avatar world post the 100 years of war would eventually fracture into different nations. Think Europe after WW1 and how all those empires crumbled and many new countries were born. I think the Earth Kingdom would be much like the Austro-Hungarian empire, A collection of very different ethnic groups and regions, who happen to share a border. I think that they were "united" into one country following the first Chin war. But after the peace, several regions and principalities would have resented centralised control from Ba Sing Se and opted for independence.

The Firenation, on the other hand, is a bit more like Britain with many overseas colonies. Lightning Ridge is not beholden unto the Firneation simply because it is a former colony. Australia is a former colony of England, but that are not in charge of us. I think that following the 100 years war, there would have been a bit of turmoil in the colonies, but eventually most of them would have gained independent status and become either self governing entities or sovereign nations. They still would have firenation/earth kingdom heritage, but they would have their own customs and laws.

This is a long way of saying that I think that the Avatar world should have broken into multiple nations rather than remained as only four. Lightning Ridge and Cradle Mountain are two of the new "nations" and exist as two completely independent city states.

Next chapter: We will properly meet Uncle. Aang will get some advice (but that is to be expected when Uncle is around). There will be a trip to the Northern Water Tribe where there will be some healing.

Til then lovely readers...


	3. Lightning crashes

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

Lightning crashes

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

Aang sometimes dreamed of Iroh. The wily, wise dragon. The man who taught Aang that it is better to put one foot in front of the other and keep moving forward.

Moving forward was much better than running away. You don't solve any problem by running away from it.

Problems are patient. Problems don't just vanish. Problems just wait.

You always come across them again.

-o-

_Many many moons ago..._

Aang cringed and flinched his way through the first monsoon season after the war. The firenation monsoonal storms were legendary. Plump raindrops fell, hard and heavy, on the hot roofs. Thunder boomed and lightning sizzled the sky. Every crack of lightning made Aang jump. He got jumpy. Getting jumpy made him get snappy. He couldn't sleep for the noise at night. He was tired all the time. Being tired all the time made him angry.

This snappy, angry, tired person wasn't like him at all.

Katara fussed over him all the time, nagged him to get some sleep. He found her fussing annoying. For the first time it made him feel worse and not better. They had a fight about it. She told him she only fussed because she cared, because she worried, because she loved him. She did love him, but not in the way Aang once hoped she would. He didn't want her to love him the way she did now - like he was an idiot kid who couldn't take care of himself and needed to be tucked in for naps. He felt all grown up and too old for that now.

He told her he could sleep if it wasn't for the storm that was always raging. It was just the stupid lightning, all the time. It kept him awake. It reminded him of bad things.

-o-

It reminded him of pain, death, fire, advice he should have listened to but ignored.

Azula and the crystal catacombs. _If you leave now, you wont be able to go into the Avatar state at all._ Failing everyone. Again.

Ozai, standing over him, laughing over the fate of his peaceful people, while a firestorm raged. Redirecting the bolt and feeling the crackle and the hum of that incredible power. _If you make a single mistake – it's all over. I know you're scared – but you'll **have to do this.** I wouldn't ask if you didn't need to. _

Aang was twelve years old.

He didn't want to die. But he didn't want to kill anyone either.

-o-

Zuko was the only other person he knew who had been struck by lightning and lived. Zuko tried to talk to him about the lightning. Zuko didn't like to talk about it, but he tried anyway – because he could see Aang was upset...and probably because Katara asked him to. Aang had always wondered about that. Did they talk about him when he wasn't there?

_You know Aang, Katara thinks that's just...oh what's the word... it's got a psycho in it. _

_I'm not psycho!_

_No, oh no – I wasn't saying that. _

_It sure sounded like it!_

_Here have some calming tea. _

_Do you think I need calming tea because I'm a psycho!_

_No, I think you need calming tea and a good night's sleep because you're an over-tired pratface right now._

…_. fine, I'll have some stupid tea. _

_**...Psychosomatic! **That's the word!_

_What? _

_It means that it's all in your head. You really think it twinges – and so it does. _

_Zuko are you saying that yours doesn't twinge or hurt at all?_

_I think mine hurts differently to yours, buddy. _

_Oh._

_Look Aang, I know this is bothering you...and you know...if you need to...we can talk...about it...if we really **have** to..._

_No, It's okay Zuko. You don't have to talk. Thanks anyway though. _

-o-

A long long time later, Aang realised what Zuko meant by hurting differently. Aang first thought the difference was about remembering the hurt. The hurt and the memory of hurt were two different things. Aang carried both. He remembered every second of that terrible plummet. The flashing of the green crystals as he fell past, helpless. The ground rising to meet him and he, for the first time in his entire life, felt powerless to halt his descent. The world getting dark and filling with the one overpowering thought; I Don't Want To Die. I don't want to die. Idontwanttodie.

Everytime the lightning crashed, Aang remembered that moment in painful clarity. Zuko claimed he didn't remember the lighting at all. That made their hurts different.

Aang thought that because Zuko didn't remember the lightning, that he would be less haunted by it. But he didn't realise that Zuko was just haunted in a different way. Zuko had been hurt by lightning too, but not in the usual way. Not in the way it hurt Aang. Aang had been hurt by his enemies. The two people who had shot lightning at Zuko were his father and his sister. Lightning from people who were meant to love you no matter what– that would hurt differently.

Hurting differently didn't mean that it hurt any less.

-o-

Iroh had taken Aang for a journey up into the rumbling mountains. _A little holiday is good for your mental well being, Avatar Aang. _

There were pictures drawn in the sand. They discussed the illusion of separation. Lightning bending was really just separated chi coming back together – did Aang know that? Lightning was just firebending technique. Just a tool. In and of itself, it was nothing to be afraid of.

There was nothing special about Ozai and Azula – they were just damaged people who had practised firebending until they perfected it. Just **mad** people with lightning. They were not fit to wield it, not really.

They had hurt Aang with their lightning, but that didn't have to weaken Aang. He could use what he had learned from the experience. He could turn that hurt and weakness into a strength.

Aang had defeated Ozai. He would defeat his fear of lightning, Iroh was sure.

He was a brave young man.

-o-

That day Aang came back down from the mountains unafraid of lightning.

There were many reasons to love Iroh, but Aang would always love him for that day. For his patience and kindness. For "It's just a technique. A technique which you can master", stick-figure drawings and the sea of chi.

Aang wondered if Iroh's spirit had any more pearls of wisdom for him, hidden in that vast ocean of chi.

-o-

That night they talk. It is late. They are the only two people left awake in the temple. Aang found Hiro watching Kuzon sleep from the doorway of the boys dorm. He invited Hiro to join him for a cup of tea - knowing how successful this request would be.

Hiro is like and unlike Iroh at the same time. Things that a different; he is younger, his hands are calloused, he knows little of the spirits in this life. Things that are the same; his fondness for proverbs, his fondness for tea and his warmth, which shines right out of his eyes. Aang unburdens himself to this veritable stranger and likes to imagine that his is once again having one of those deep and philosophical talks with Iroh.

-o-

_You have difficult decisions Avatar Aang._

_What would you do if you were me?_

_If I were you Aang, I fear I would **not** show your restraint and mercy. For what he did to my sister..to my nephew...**I would fill his bones with hot lead. **_

_Do you think he deserves to die then?_

_Perhaps he does...he is a **terrible **person. He has done horrible things...but remember that he has hurt people I love very much, so it is only natural for me to wish to hurt him back. Take my words with more than a grain of salt._

_Do you think I should kill him then?_

_I think you are right not to be so eager to deal out death and judgement. Men like Chin do that – hand out death like it is their right to decide who lives and who dies. What gives them that right? They think that violence and agression gives them power. They need to kill to feel important. They will never realise that there is infinitely more power and reward in granting life and helping things grow and flourish._

_What should I do?_

_It is not my place to tell you what to do Avatar Aang. Only you can decide that..._

_Oh._

_I imagine your job must be a bit like being a gardener for the whole world. Your entire life is about helping things grow in harmony. The garden you preside over is a lovely place. You do your duty well. Sure, you must **pull a few weeds **now and then – but I think that is the only way to give the delicate flowers a chance to blossom._

_Thank you Hiro._

_-o-_

Notes:

So this little chapter is really more Aang development focused and looks at how he begins to confront some of his problems head on. Considering the year Aang had, I actually think it would be likely that he would have some sort of PSTD - especially given how jarring this battle-ridden year would have been given his peaceful upbringing. When all the chaos has died down, and his duty wasn't overwhelming him and he had time to actually think - I reckon Aang would be very bothered by all the events of the past year. Aang would find the lightning from the monsoonal storms to be a very painful and triggering reminder of the crystal catacombs and how he would have died if not for the spirit water (and technically did die for a bit there).

One of the recommended treatments of PSTD (though there are many and everyone's experience is different) is to gradual expose someone to possible triggers of the trauma and to help them put that trauma in context and given them a more balanced picture. Iroh would have done this for Aang in the mountains, by helping him understand the technicalities of lightning and gradually exposing it to him and teaching him that it is a natural phenomenon and bending tool - not something inherently evil. Also reinforcing lightning re-direction for him would have made Aang feel more empowered to stop the lightning, should he ever come up against a lightning bender again. Iroh, by getting Aang to admit that he has a problem and needs to try and overcome it - would have given him a big nudge in the right direction. Exposing him to lightning and working with him to overcome his phobia is a very direct approach to dealing with this problem. The direct approach worked well in this case, and I would like to think that Aang woul learn that sometimes beating around a problem or avoiding it and ignoring it is not productive. (Avoidance tendencies and increased irritation are both symptoms of PSTD).

I also like to think that at some point Aang would grow out of Katara's mothering and try and assert his own indepence, and so a bit of that is happening here. As Aang grows up, he'll want to be treated more like an adult. Katara consistently mothers him in the show (Even in SC she is playing the mother role to him) and eventually this disparity in how Aang would wants to be seen and treated by her (as an adult) and how she views and treats him (as a child) would come to a head. But I will explore how Aang feels about this more deeply next chapter. Also next chapter will be lost more Sassy!Old!Toph! (as she is awesome).

Til then lovelies.


End file.
